Tragicmulattoes's Blog

May 9, 2011

Don’t Play the Game With Biracial Women

I haven’t blogged in a very long time, mostly because I haven’t been inspired. I’ve been drawn to other things. Frankly, race talk gets frustrating. But I will leave this blog up as long as I can. I appreciate the comments. I read them. I think through them. I accept them or I don’t.

Recently a commenter chided me for being “hostile” towards Biracial Tiffany and her “jealous blacks” story because, the commenter said, “Black women ARE jealous. It’s just a fact”. You can see her comment and my response here.

After responding, I decided to fish around Tiffany’s blog for the first time in ages. I’m glad I did. I’m glad my comment to the girl was spot on. I’m glad I trusted my own instincts and experiences and responded truthfully rather than diplomatically. And I’m glad I am encouraging everyone, but particularly Black women, to understand what happens when Black women are silent about the dysfunctions and hypocrisies of biracial women, while you allow them to shape the stories that others hear about you. The post in question is here

While participating in racial voyeurism on BlackHairMedia.com, Biracial Tiffany (who admittedly has little connection with Black people in her offline life-which makes her voyeurism that much more interesting…and sad) came across a discussion about Halle Berry in which some poster stated that she does not believe Halle, or other Bircials are Black, nor should they be identified as such. Halle, the poster believes, should NOT be considered the “Most Beautiful Black Woman”. Makes sense, right? This argument has been made before, even by biracial writers. Basically, should half Black women be the dominant images of Black women we see in media? The simple answer is no. But when a Black woman says it, it’s a big problem for tragic mulattos.

No. Black women must be hateful and jealous. Biracial Tiffany decides that her opinion on the matter is so inflammatory that she best not mention it at all.  Her other commenters aren’t as cowardly:

 

jess2248 says:
no one represents me, but me, and i do not represent other black women. as i said before, as soon as this country can get away from this race and color thing, i think we will all be better off. you have blacks and whites telling biracial people how they can or cannot identify. it’s ridiculous. i hate to hear biracial (non-black with black) being hated on by black or white women, but black especially. it always comes off sounding like envy. and that is just another divisive tactic in my opinion. i don’t hear a lot of it in this blog, but on others it gets really nasty.

Now I’m not trying to be funny. Look at the image above. Does this look like a woman who will EVER have to worry about negotiating her racial identity with white women? LOL-would she dare to try if she could? Exactly. She’s talking about being “hated on”. I will stop right here. The commenter I discussed earlier that said I was hostile to Tiffany claimed Black women are jealous of her hair. This commenter has typical African hair (and nose and lips) but still experiences this gut-wrenching jealousy. How can this be??????

Remember what I said about the complex. If it is not excessive adoration, tragic mulattos will believe it is jealousy. 

An even bigger tragedy, Margie said:

And I havete. But I hat the “big” curly kinky hair that black people call “Good hair” and then get mad at me when I repeat them. I’m just discovering the fact that a lot of black women get perms and wigs to try and look like their mulatto counterparts. (ex: Halle Berry. Black Women get weaves to look like Halle Berry and then the media just labels them all black. “This is how to do black women’s hair- no it’s not.

She must not know that Halle wears weaves. And tons of them. She must not know that biracials straighten and relax their hair. Tons of them. Who are they trying to look like??? Take a wild guess. The above comment was said  after she went on about her lack of commonality with “the blacks”. Sigh…

The other ones were too stupid to stay on topic and started talking about how music and money makes them less Black. Typical minority racial hierarchy climbing stuff, talking about being the special darky at expensive White schools (and pretending like they just blended in there and had no racial experiences, lmao). No need to cover that stuff here.

Of course Bethenny was the clueless white mom worried for her future tragedy:

Bethany

Reading that conversation was really annoying to me…which surprised me. I don’t usually take those kinds of comments personally. I’m white and my husband is black…I get so sad when I think about how my children are going to have to hear and deal with conversations like that. Like they’re a science experiment or a food that needs to be labeled. I wish people would get a life. I wish it didn’t have to be a debate. I’m sorry Tiff, I’m just so sad right now for my children. I hope I can raise them to be above all the superficial and negative energy people give out on the topic.

Black women owning their identities and deciding who is “them” and who isn’t, is interpreted by a White woman as “negativity”. Read my post about the origins of the modern biracial movement. It started with women like her.

So to sum up this whole exchange on Tiffany’s blog, if Halle calls herself Black, they’re mad. If Black women say Halle is biracial, they’re mad. if Black women say Halle is Black, they’re mad. Anything a Black woman has to say that is not a loving, uncritical complement…THEY WILL BE MAD.

You may not be allowed to tell other people who they are, but you sure as hell can tell them they ARE NOT LIKE YOU. Everyone has a place in this conversation. Especially if they’re toying with your racial identity.

In this “post racial” climate, Black women can’t win for losing.  Do Not Play Their Game. When it comes to your identity, you’re allowed to set your own rules. Tragic mulattos be darned.

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